This post is in response to two comments people posted a couple of posts back: Riley’s question asking for “a way to explain why it is queer women are more into the transdudes than the queer men are” and to Curious’s question “Why does it seem like there are a lot of women who usually date women who are willing if not eager to date ftm transsexuals yet who are as just as unwilling to date men. Is it somehow related to the fact that (I don’t know the exact numbers) many transsexual men don’t have surgery? If a person doesn’t have a cock, then sexually speaking some gay dudes just don’t know what to do with them. None of this is intended to slag gay men as a whole…
What does this say about the nature (perhaps not the best word) of transsexuals? Often, despite its many advantages over the flesh and blood sort, a silicone cock is not enough to convince them that there is a bona fide cock/guy in the room with them. but it is my speculative point of view on the trend that Riley, and many trannyfag friends of mine, have noticed.
As the world's premier producer of transmale adult entertainment, people have been asking me for years where and how they could meet FTMs.
I've also responded to countless questions from transmen, wondering about the best way to meet potential partners.
So women are old hat at reconsidering the meanings of gender, and when you extrapolate that into dyke lives, even more so.
Now, gay men play with gender too, to be sure – I wouldn’t deny that. Gay guys play with gender in ways that have nothing (necessarily) to do with feminism or body politics or anything; they tend to be much more drawn towards camp and drag and other such strategies for challenging gender stereotypes, but they’re coming at it from a place of male privilege, not of being on the short end of the gender stick in the first place.
” Two quick answers to Riley’s question: sexism and cock. Sexism: Many, though certainly not all, gay men are as much purveyors of good old-fashioned sexism as their hetero counterparts, but they have the added bonus of not being sexually attracted to women, which allows them the privilege of considering female body parts to be “eeewwww disgusting” without anyone really calling them on the misogyny behind that. I’m not a trans guy and I’ve still had a lot of gay guys get really into me… With the notable exception of fisting, the gay male sexual repertoire is just so highly focused on cock (how big, how long, cut or uncut, what can you do with it, what will you let me do with it, etc.) that any variation on that particular appendage can cause anxiety – let alone the presence of someone whose appearance is fully male but who is missing the all-important organ. I’d definitely welcome comments from gay men who may have other ideas on this point! The vast majority of dykes have done a lot of thinking about gender – not as a rule but definitely as a rule of thumb.
But there was still no special dating site catering to the unique needs of transmen.
Almost 100% of members have a bachelor’s, master’s, and/or doctorate degree, and if that’s a dating preference for you, you’re in good hands here.
Our Time is the largest subscription dating site for singles over 50, not to mention it’s also the #1 dating app among that demographic.
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The 5 apps below are some of the most popular in the dating space as a whole, but they’re also great for gay singles.